.: asylum for the sane :.

I feel exhausted. It’s as if the accumulated exhaustion of this entire year has decided to ambush me at year end.

2009 has been a very long year to say the least.

Health

I’ve been a complete klutz this year. Awfully accident prone and oftenly sick. Who could forget my week long MC as I lay in bed thinking I was gonna die from food poisoning? Drama Queen, that I am

Or the time that I sprained both ankles (which led to both entire legs hurting so much) just because I took a wrong landing as I jumped over a ditch? And I came back from the hospital with both legs bandaged? Haha

or what about the time I sprained my hand and arm from slamming a door really hard?

Yes a cam whore never misses a chance to cam whore. Even if it means taking the photo with her sprained hand. Tsk.

I think this year I took more MCs than I would annual leaves haha. Let’s hope for better health next year then. Maybe I shouldn’t mention here that I’ve been having chest pains. But oh well, I just did. Shh.

Career

I worked so damn hard this year. Looking back on my accomplishments at work this year, I feel a tinge of pride. It’s truly a lot of work to have come thus far. I’ve learnt so many things, gotten to know so many new people, people come people go.

My teams in Jakarta grew by leaps and bounds and suddenly I have 2 incredibly big, capable and talented teams there that I can rely at any given time or day. And these two teams practically make two out of many firm foundations of the site.

And for the first time, I’ve started growing a team in Singapore too. Incredible. Even though it is something very new (less than a month), it has been incredibly exciting and fun to have my own team here.

More powers indeed come with extra responsibilities, as I’ve learned this year.

Of course with success come haters, which I totally do not give a shit about. 2009 has been an amazing year at work, despite the fact that I came close to giving up completely once or twice. I really am glad I didn’t. Here’s to another long, exciting and rewarding work year in 2010!

Personal Achievements

This is where I wish I can that I’ve learned how to ride a bicycle, or completed a marathon or won awards. But I didn’t achieve any of that. But what I did achieve (on a personal basis) are:

1) I finally got a domain. Thank you Toni, Nico and Indra for helping with the set up. and thank you FP for teaching me how to change my own theme, lol. Yes I work for a website but I can still be a tech-idiot at times.

2) I survived an earthquake. Even though I couldnt sleep for 2 weeks after that.

3) I learned how to bake! First for FP’s birthday cake (hehehe) and then for my own pleasure. Which reminds me, I haven’t baked in months!

4) I survived levels 3 and 4 of crazy spicy buffalo wings, despite sweat, tears and crazy internal heat. and the runs.

Part II still in the works. Be patient!

I was right there when it happened, unbelievable but true.

At first, I didn’t even feel a thing. I even thought it was a fire drill when everyone started to stand up. This was despite vaguely hearing the word “earthquake” which caused people to stand up in the first place.

Selective hearing, much?

But as soon as I stood up, I could feel the building literally swaying. At first a little, which I found very exciting (because I have never experienced anything like it before). And then when it didn’t stop and seem to get worse, I think my face turned pale and I panicked.

I felt scared, and stunned all at the same time. Many people have started evacuating the building and I just stood there. And then I decided that I shall also go down – this was in my subconsciousness. But then my colleague Maggie screamed at me to take my bag along. So I went back to the office to grab my bag.

During this time, we could all still feel the swaying and my face was probably getting more panicky by the second.

And then.. it seemed to stop. Looking out the window, I saw people standing outside the building as if it were a normal fire drill.

View from the 5th level of Wisma 77, Jakarta

There were more people actually but I guess they moved away by the time this photo was taken. Below is a photo of a crack that was created in the guys’ toilet by the quake. Apparently the crack wasn’t there before, and when Nico told me about it I was very excited (despite being so frightened moments ago) because it would be a real life earthquake crack on the wall! So we got victor to bring my pretty pink camera to the land of the unknown.

I know. It doesn’t look like much. Believe me, Victor and I are disappointed to because the way Nico has described it to us made it seem really major. Like you know the big zig zag kind. But this is all we got, and this is still an official earthquake crack. Pretty cool.

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Aftermath of Earthquake

Of course I had to sms FP and tell him what had happened. To be precise, I sent him this message:

“Earthquake! Building is shaking and swaying!”

To which of course he panicked big time, which was really sweet because he urged me to take a flight back to Singapore amongst other things. He got angry because to him, this was the last straw. He made me promised him to find better prospects when I get home.

While it was mainly the anger and fear talking, his main concern was.. “What if anything happens to Sha?”

It is at times like this, in the wake of natural disasters that you know just how much you are loved. You know that someone cares enough as to whether you are dead or alive, safe or in danger, injured or not. It doesn’t matter that you have always known that this someone loves you more than life itself, but it is always accentuated in the face of danger.

It is good to be loved

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Traumatized

What I experienced from level 5 of the office building may not be anything major but it haunted me for many nights. It was measured as 7.3 on the Richter scale which was pretty high by earthquake standards. There was news that there will be several aftershocks of the earthquake.

On top of it all, I was staying on the 21st floor of the hotel. And the higher you are, the worse it will be (so I’ve learned). Apparently, at our sister company on the 20th floor, they had to hold on to things when trying to evacuate the building. Many fell while running. It all sounds very scary and very real.

So that very night, I woke up several times before Sahur. After Sahur, I found it hard to go back to sleep for the longest time. And when I finally drifted off, I was ambushed by weird and scary dreams. All sorts of it. And Maggie told me that I actually screamed.

Same thing the following night. Except that no nightmares, just a major case of insomnia. Even on my first night back in Singapore, I still couldn’t sleep at all! I guess psychologically, I am / was scared of it happening again. I didn’t want to sleep because I was afraid I will wake up to a swaying room or worse in rubbles.

Contrary to what I said about finding the whole thing exciting (which is true), it is also very frightening. Thank God, I wasn’t near the Epicenter and that my building didn’t turn to rubbles.

It may not be a full fledge earthquake experience, but it is enough to make it a lasting memory.